Thanksgiving weekend. The turkey has been eaten, games played, and hugs shared. Even had time to squeeze in a few Christmas movies with my mom-in-law. After 2 days of parties, friends and food it is Saturday and I find myself home alone in a quiet house. Josh and Kate had plans with friends and Mike and the little boys went to watch the game at his parents’ house.
My home is quiet. It is mostly clean, that is the perk of being gone the majority of the time…no one is home to mess it up. As I walked through the hall and rounded the stairs, I noticed the scuffs and dirt on the front door, it is the way all the doors entering my house looked. My eyes then traveled to the chipped drywall and some faded crayon marks on the walls from years ago. As I made my way to the top of the stairs my mind raced back to a day about 10 years ago now. I was vacuuming the hall at the top of the stairs sucking up the carpet sheddings that were left with any new carpet installation. I turned the vacuum off. As I sat in the floor I peered into the empty bedrooms leading off the hall. The smell of fresh paint and new carpet permeated the air. We would move in tomorrow. As I sat there I thought to myself, “it’ s funny to think that someday we will have lived her 10 years and this very hallway won’t be new anymore. I had never lived in a house only 5 years old, let alone brand new, so I was just soaking up all the…no one has ever lived here before me-ness of the house.
As my mind rushed back to this present moment, looking at this house that was now in desperate need of some drywall patching, fresh paint, and a carpet cleaning I couldn’t help but smile. Here I was in the very spot I was 10 years ago saying now, “Wow, I can’t believe it has been 10 years.” And I find myself thankful for the dirt, thankful for the dents, and even thankful for the dirty socks I see someone left in the hall…Bo I am sure. Which is especially funny to me, because 10 years ago, we only had 3 kids, and I got rid of all my baby stuff because I was done…and then I changed my mind.
But today, my heart is full. Yes I have experienced my fair share of heartache and pain. And the weight of Zayne still lingers in my thoughts. But we are blessed. I am blessed with a community that loves and supports me. And I have an amazing family both blood and just because we “should” be related. I have friend who I know I could call and in a spilt second they would be by my side, no questions asked. The happiness and joy I have experience with my own little family outweighs all the trials I have been through. And I pray as I face whatever may lie ahead of me, that I always look at the love I have in my heart for the Man I am so lucky share this life with, and our kids we have had the privilege of raising and say to myself. LIFE IS GOOD.
So let your heart be full today my friends. No matter what lemons have been thrown our way, there is something to be grateful for, and as we focus on our blessings our heart can’t help but feel warm.
Happy Thanksgiving to all…and to all a full heart…and belly.